Swami's 2003 State of the Universe Address
By Swami Beyondananda
Hello everybody ! it is great to be here . . . and you know what? We
really have no choice. Because no matter where we are, we are always
here. And it is always now. In fact, there's even a book called The
Power of Now. I haven't had time to read it yet, but I hope to get to it
in a later now.
Meanwhile, back in this now, the issue facing the United States, and
indeed the world is, will George Bush give in to his Big Iraq Attack and
order up a war? Latest reports say that a war to force a regime change
in Iraq will cost $200 billion. It is puzzling to me why some of those
fiscal fitness fanatics in the Republican Party haven't tried to find a
cheaper way to do it. Maybe if they offered the Iraqis half -- $100
billion , they could do it themselves!!
Then we'd still have $100 billion left to spend on regime change in this
country.
Because , and I have to be blunt here , the folks we have in charge are
fossils fueled by fossil fuels. And in the reptilian brain, problems
aren't solved, they're attacked.
Like the War on Poverty. Remember that? I'm happy to report that it's
finally over. The poor people have all surrendered. And take the War on
Drugs , please! How many billions have they spent? My solution is
cheaper and more effective . . . improve reality!
Now we have the War on Terrorism. We're going to terrorize those
terrorists into giving up terrorism if it's the last thing we do! And it
just might be. The good news is ? and I have it on the Highest Authority
, there will indeed be peace on Earth. Whether we humans are around to
enjoy it, that is up to us.
No wonder there is so much fear, uncertainty and confusion on the
planet. I'll tell you how bad it's gotten. You've heard of Heisenberg's
Uncertainty Principle? Well, they're not even sure about THAT anymore.
And so, more and more people are turning to the mystics for answers.
I have often said there are two kinds of mystics, the optimystics and
the pessimystics. Now pessimystics seem to be more in touch with
,reality, but optimystics are happier and live longer for some reason.
The pessimystics have been crying, "The sky is falling, the sky is
falling!" The optimystics say, "No. It just looks that way because we
are ascending."
Now, for those people who read the news , not to mention those
unfortunate enough to BE in the news , last year was not an easy year to
keep an optimystic attitude with so much pessimystic evidence. Call me a
hopeless ,hopium, addict, but I choose to accentuate the positive. For
example, you can say we human beings have moved further down the path of
self-destruction. Or you could say the Earth is ridding itself of a
virulent parasite.
You can despair over continuing war, disease and starvation, or you can
go, "Hey, population control the good, old fashioned way ,without birth
control or abortion." Who says "compassionate conservative" is an oxymoron?
You can worry about the government taking liberties with our liberties
or you can say, "Life has become simpler! They've boiled the Bill of
Rights down to just one: You have the right to remain silent."
So I am not going to dwell on the negative. As my guru, Harry Cohen
Baba, used to say, "Life is like photography . . . we use the negative
to develop." So let us look at the bright side.
George Bush was responsible for a great spiritual advance last year, as
well. He upgraded the Golden Rule for the new millennium. It's now the
Gold Rule: "Doodoo unto others before they can doodoo unto you."
And -- say what you will , President Bush has made great strides on
behalf of minority representation. Never before have we had a President
who was looking out for a smaller minority.
Now this is the State of the Universe Address, and seen from that higher
perspective, things look great! I am happy to report that the Universe
continued to expand in 2002, and in fact, they actually had to let the
Photon Belt out another notch. An expanding Universe means more jobs
too, so we can expect a steady influx of aliens looking for work. Yep,
the Universe just keeps purring in perfection, ever-changing as usual.
The planets continue to harmoniously spin in their orbits, and except
for the occasional case of asteroids, they just calmly go about their
business.
Meanwhile, back here on earth, things are a bit more problematical. We
still haven't fully recovered from that vicious dogma attack of 911. But
as an optimystic, I believe you can indeed teach an old dogma new
tricks, simply by changing the emPHAsis to another sylLABle. Instead of
focusing only on emergency measures, why not take emerge n SEE measures?
When we emerge from our fearful hiding places and see from the cosmic
comic perspective, we realize that beneath all the stress and distress
and sadness in life there is a deep well of joy. Each time we let
laughter bubble up from the well, we experience deep wellness. Levity
helps us overcome gravity, especially when we shine the light of
laughter on those poorly-lit corridors of power.
Do you know what the leading cause of terrorism is? It's seriousness.
I'm serious. Think about it. Those people have no sense of humor.
Otherwise, how could they believe they will get to heaven by putting
other people through hell?
Here is my vision: A suicide bomber arrives at the Gates of Heaven, and
God clops him over the head and says, "SCHMUCK! What'd you do that for?
72 virgins? YOU get one 72-year-old virgin, and his name starts with
Ayatollah!"
But if Americans are willing to revive the Iraqi Horror Picture Show
just to feed our out-of-control oil habit, how are we that different?
How many innocents will be put through hell, just to preserve our little
corner of relative heaven? There is no real peace without harmony and
balance, only the vicious cycle of injustice. Peons get tired of getting
peed on, right? You get pissed on, and pretty soon you're gonna get
pissed off. This causes the hot spots to flare, and pretty soon you have
an uprising, which usually results in a downfall. All these uprisings
and downfalls can be wearing on the body politic.
Fortunately, we do have a choice. One of my favorite stories recently is
about a Native American grandfather talking to his young grandson. He
tells the boy he has two wolves inside of him struggling with each
other. The first is the wolf of peace, love and kindness. The other wolf
is fear, greed and hatred. "Which wolf will win, grandfather?", asks the
young boy. "Whichever one I feed," is the reply.
Every day , every moment , we have the choice to feed the wolf of love
or the wolf of fear. It is interesting that we are called humanKIND.
What better time than now to find out, can mankind treat man kindly?
I have a dream . . . I call it tell-a-vision. I say, if you're
dissatisfied with the current programming, you can turn off your TV and
tell a vision instead. Here is my vision: Remember the Manhattan Project
during World War II? It took less than four years for a group of
scientists to develop the first weapon of mass destruction. My vision
is, we can do even better for an even worthier goal. We could call it
the Manhelpin Project, and its purpose would be to develop the first
weapon of mass construction instead.
Think about it. What if we used that $200 billion set to detonate in
Iraq, and put it toward becoming the worldwide leader in renewable,
clean, sustainable energy sources? Now theres some real power. Create
something so plentiful you don't have to pay an army to protect your
share. A healthy income, a healthy outcome . . . what could possibly
make more sense? Boy, talk about feeding two birds with one scone!
The choice is up to us. If we want an alternative, we must feed the -
alter- native economy . . . anything that alters us natives for the
better. The world we live in is a byproduct of the products we buy, is
it not?
What if we only choose to buy products with healthy byproducts? Think
about this: There are at least 45 million Americans who consciously want
to feed the wolf of peace. If each of us switched just $100 into the
alter native economy, that would be $4.5 billion!
Last year, we launched a blisskrieg and declared "all out peace." I'm
happy to report it is already working. More people are letting their
inner peace out, and these outbreaks of peace are actually causing
esteem to rise! And we all know that rising esteem is good for the
atmosphere.
As esteem rises, more people on the planet will be able to be all that
they can be , without joining the army!! And when more of us put our
energy into love and laughter instead of criticizing and condemning, we
will have Uncritical Mass . . . and we will bring about Nonjudgment Day
and along with it, Disarmaggedon. Now you might be wondering, what will
Nonjudgment Day look like? Let me tell another vision.
I have been to the heights of levity, and I have seen people all over
the world dancing together in the universal dance of fool realization .
. . The Hokey Pokey. I want you to hold this vision with me: all of the
world leaders at the United Nations beginning their sessions with the
Hokey Pokey.
What if Ariel Sharon and Yasser Arafat put their whole selves in? That
would be commitment. And then pulled their whole selves out. That is
detachment. Then they turn themselves around, which is transformation.
And that, my friends, is what it is all about!
So, how can you help raise the laugh force on the planet enough to bring
about Nonjudgment Day? First, you can take a vow of levity, and laugh
more. And we even have a Laughmore Society to help you do just that.
Next, you can support everyone's right to laugh by joining the Right To
Laugh Party . . . ,"One big party, everyone is invited. All for fun, and
fun for all."
Commit random acts of comedy. Practice Fun Shui and leave the world a
funnier place. Anything to elicit a moment of fool-realization with a
spark of laughter. Because only when we lovingly laugh at our
foolishness, can we seriously change things for the better. May you wake
up laughing and leave laughter in your wake . . . and may the Farce be
with you.
